Sunday, June 15, 2008

Father's Day

So, my first Father's Day with these three shnerps. I did wish my own dad a happy day, but in my eternal narcissism, my reflections this year were all about me. An old friend and I were discussing the idea of "becoming" over the past few weeks -- that concept is usually applied to adolescents, as if that's the only time you're really becoming anything -- but we were thinking about how we've grown and changed as adults. This is what I wrote:
"I've become a dad -- that blows me away some days, because not only would I not really have predicted it, I also couldn't have known how much it would become my identity (or that I'd be ok with it when it did). But when I try to conjure up a picture of my life, and my sense of purpose right now...I'm a dad. And a husband, but with young kids even that role is secondary. Seven years ago, it was all about me, but now it seems I'm defining myself most by my relationship to those I love.

You asked about life for us these days. It is a good life. My only real criticism is that it is too myopic, too inward-focused...but I think that may be partly due to this life stage, when it really is about creating the foundation for our family over the next couple of decades. My hope is that we expand our sphere of influence and experience as the kids get older, rather than just plodding onto the treadmill of consumption and endless soccer practices."
Being on parental leave is amazing because it represents so much time (relatively, anyway). Time to play, to hang out and just be around the kids. It's been greatness. I've apparently been only taking photos of the kids and flowers these last couple of weeks...

Ezra has been a frequent target: with Tannis, and again, getting into Grandma's birthday cake, hanging out in the playhouse, in black 'n white and looking cherubic.

He's finally recovered from a nasty cold that made him the worst roommate ever, and he's sleeping "normally" again. Lots of clinging and whining and moaning, but also more independent play and smiling, happy times when he's being a total monkey. He pulls up on everything, threatening to walk away...climbs the slide on his own, and tries to eat anything within his grasp...but spits his real food at me when it doesn't measure up.

Ella is embracing summer, spending most of each day outside: breakfast on the dock, practicing soccer, laughing, enjoying the rain, finding treasure and hamming it up. She's gentle and fun and creative -- always willing to help out, and happy to do her own thing for hours at a time. Maybe she can teach Ezra that trick some day.

Ivy got to break me in on this whole fatherhood thing almost seven years ago -- as the vanguard of this trio, she'll probably keep breaking me in through the tough stuff of the next ten years. As Grade 1 winds down, she's been more tired and tense at times, but usually recovering quickly and starting up something creative and fun. Some photos: showing off her henna, also enjoying the rain, looking like a seven-year-old supermodel, and flashing those baby blues.


Pearl said...

Awesome posting Jer. Always love reading about the kids and seeing the changes.

Jeremy said...

Thanks, Pearl. Thought you might appreciate this post. I've been tempted to add a more realistic update to balance the all-positive gushing...but maybe I'll just keep it to myself.